The True Story of the Nico Party

 The Nico Party was arguably the most influential organization in Americonian history (besides the UFA government). From its emergence from a Mafia coalition in early 2024 to its dissolution in Febuary of 2025, the Nico Party has gained notoriety for its various deeds. Before Unami Creek, the Americonian Mafia stole hundreds of tokens from law-abiding Americonians, even before organizing itself under the Nico Party’s leadership. Its political platform consisted of anti-Americonianism and kleptocracy, and nothing symbolized its terrifying ideology better than its slogan: We are in your walls.

As cryptic and mysterious as this organization was to outsiders, its leader was by no means a secret. Gabe Shelly, a young UFS student, was a key figure in the Americonian Mafia and founded the Nico Party. Under his leadership, the Nico Party declared war on the United Friends of America on June 5 and pitted its members against their own friends in a brutal splash fight, which is now known as the Battle of Unami Creek. Gabe’s motives were to create an authoritarian state known as the Republic of Neegan. Its currency would have been Kromer and its government would have distributed banknotes with negatuve values to keep its citizens in debt. Luckily, the UFA won the battle the same day, and the Nico Party’s power was diminished.

The Nico Party’s reign of terror was not over, however. The day after the battle, Gabe rigged the election by filing numerous false ballots to rig the UFA’s election. The fraud resulted in Nico Party nominee Karina becoming President. Gabe would have himself become Vice President, but the Constitution did not allow those who had previously engaged in insurrection to serve in office. (Surely any country that has such constitutional provisions would enforce them, lest that individual decide to run for reelection.) After the election, the Nico Party was rather quiet, as was the President.

The Nico Party dissolved on February 2, 2025. However, its ideologies have not disappeared from Americonian society. The Nico Party is not within our walls, but its adherents may be within our nation, your governate, or your company. They may even be someone you care deeply about. It’s our responsibility to educate the people of this nation about the Nico Party’s actions and ideologies. It’s our responsibility to confront adherents to Nico Party ideologies and remind them of the importance of the UFA’s democracy and civil liberties. And if we do not, it may one day be our responsibility to repeat the Battle of Unami Creek.